We are always told to find a nice partner who’ll become our soulmate and settle down. Meet a nice man, get married, and have babies is the expectation, right? I’ve even read an article that stated we may encounter three different kind of loves in our lifetime. The first is our baby love. It’s the first love we encounter and everything seems like perfection because we’re naive. Our second is our toxic love. Our toxic love is the recognition to the bad side of love, a little too bad. We are involved with someone or become someone who is possessive and jealous, maybe even abusive. The third and final is our logical love, it’s effortless, mature, and just works the way it should. But what about our other loves, our other kind of soulmate?… What about our best friends?
This made me think of my best friend. I found my soulmate when I was 12 years old. She was the funniest person I had ever met, the one who would pay for my pizza when I didn’t have money, and the one who would cover for me whenever I needed to sneak out. We rode our bikes together, lied to our parents together, and stayed out until midnight exploring the town. I remember those long late nights as kids, we thought we were on top of the world. We’d cry about life while laying on our backs, watching the stars. We experienced every heart break together and told each other everything. We shared our first hangover and stories of losing our virginity. She’s seen me neurotic, happy, and in times of desperation. Most importantly, she’s seen my growth. Is it safe to say that our best friends can become one of our loves as well?
I believe, yes. But it’s a different kind of love because it’s a different type of bond. A bond between women is like no other, it’s science. We are sisters, we are biologically compatible, we feel each other’s pain. So there’s always a part of us that we will never share with a man the way we share with our best friends. A very very special part of us. That’s why most of the time you’ll hear us say, losing a friendship is a greater loss than losing a man. Now, i’m not saying that a man is not important. He may play a significant role in your growth. You may find great love in a man, you may bare your body and soul to him. He may see things in you and evoke things in you that you never knew existed. But there are things you will go through that he will simply not be able to understand or relate to, (especially if he’s the one causing the trouble). I know for me, when I am going through something so intense, I crave the arms of my partner. But it is my best friend’s voice, my soulmate who I met when I was 12 years old, that I need to comfort me.